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Virgo: A very fat man will
sit next to you on the bus, and he won't have had a bath since Christmas.
begins the story of Jess Jordan. Each day begins with a funny horrorscope
from her absent dad that gives her a laugh. But being a 15-year-old
girl isn't filled with laughs. Take, for instance, Ben Jones.
He is the current object of her affection but she is sure he doesn't share
her feelings. And her perfect best friend, Flora, who tends to get
all the guys. And her amazing imagination that sometimes gets her
into trouble. And then, of course, there's the minestrone soup.
You'll have to read the book to find out about that. If you are a
fan of Louise Rennison or Meg Cabot, you are sure to enjoy this book.
Jess Jordan, 15, is really
trying to impress Ben Jones. Trouble is, she thinks he's really impressed
by Flora, her stunningly gorgeous best friend. (Flora is interest in Ben's
best friend, Mackenzie, which is one good thing.)
There's a party this weekend,
and Jess is getting ready to dress to impress. Her chest, however, really
could use some improvement. Jess describes her chest as "The kind of featureless
plain upon which airports get constructed."? A push-up bra might do the
trick, but who's got that kind of money? Being a resourceful and creative
person, Jess makes her own bra inserts using plastic sandwich bags and
minestrone soup. You see, the title is really true: Jess is charming but
This book ends on quite a
cliffhanger, so you'll have to read "Girl, (Nearly), 16, Absolute Torture"?
(Bernie Farrell, librarian, email@example.com)